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November 28, 2003
Doll Hut 2nd Anniversary Party
Here are some of the fun people at the Doll Hut 2nd Anniversary Party. Band photos will follow in the next issue of Barflies.net magazine.
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Posted by DJWanda at 11:13 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
AXF: SHE Monster
she lives in sin
a heart so dim
the terror of every room she's in.
she graces the streets
dislikes those she meets
she freaks out everyone she greets
she's mean, she's been told
stone-faced and cold
you'd never know she's centuries old
she's not really a fright
a morbidly beautiful sight
she monster lives for the night
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As always, if you have an idea/phrase/song.lyric/expression/image/etc. you want to use to try and influence my art and/or post, email me: aprilfalling@kuci.org . Are you up for the challenge?
<3 AXF
p.s. current music: Godless Wicked Creeps - "China Chick"
Posted by xx - aprilfalling - xx at 5:14 PM | TrackBack
November 27, 2003
Doll Hut Benefit Sunday 11/23/03
I took a LOT of pictures Sunday at the Doll Hut. Here are just a few to whet your appetite...
More to come over the weekend!
Posted by DJWanda at 12:24 AM | TrackBack
November 25, 2003
Thanksgiving Film Releases
Happy Thanksgiving my readers! It’s time to stuff yourself silly with turkey, potatoes, stuffing, and yams while desperately trying to avoid the people you would never hang out with if it wasn't for the fact you call them "family."
For me, alcohol keeps the situation bearable. Hey, it’s free and it keeps a goofy grin plastered across my face.
There is an alternative - movies. I used to work at a theater and know for a fact they are open come rain, shine, and all national and religious holidays. So go see a movie and avoid the relatives for a couple hours. It’s like a vacation within a vacation.
The Top Three Candidates for My $10:
1) In America
2) The Missing
3) My Flesh and Blood
A lot of movies are being released this weekend - some worth seeing, most worth avoiding (even if it means spending more time with veritable strangers your parents "say" are related to you)(this time I'm asking for proof). So without further delay, back to the business sparing the worthy and skewering that which should have never been made.
Haunted Mansion
Isn't this a ride at that bastion of Fascism in Anaheim? Where the only day you meet interesting people is on Bat's Day when all the local Goths do a hostile takeover of the Enchanted Kingdom and get Medieval on old Walt's frozen ass.
An uninspired cast, for an uninspired movie. Go to House of the Mouse at the end of August and ride the ride. You'll have a lot more fun and can play "Count the Piercings" while waiting in line.
The Missing
The dynamic duo that brought you A Beautiful Mind is back with their Oscar entry for this year. Cate Blanchet plays a single mother of two daughters in the late 19th century wilderness of the Southwest. One of her little whelps is kidnapped and Blanchet must turn to her estranged father (played by Tommy Lee Jones) for help.
Let's hear it for child stealing psychopaths who bring families closer together!
Timeline
Talk about getting Medieval, I wouldn't mind cat-o-nine tailing Paul Walker's fabulous behind. Unfortunately, Mr. Walker isn't enough to make me sit through this movie.
Evil Dead did it first and far better.
Bad Santa
Billy Bob Thornton plays a thief who cases department stores by playing Santa during the holidays; only he sucks at being Santa. Then, Angelina's ex-husband meets and befriends a young loser who helps teach him the meaning of Christmas.
Out of all the holiday themed movies this year, this could be the best. But that's like being the white stuff on top of a pile of chicken poop. It may be white, but its still crap.
The Cooler
Bernie (William H. Macy) is so unlucky he makes a living at it. The pit boss at a casino sends him to a table where someone is winning and his bad luck rubs off on them. Then Bernie falls in love and his luck changes for the better, except now he's out of a job. Happy Holidays to you too.
It looks contrived, but cute. Possibly worth seeing on cable in a few months.
In America
An out of work actor from Ireland drags his family to NYC so that he can be an out of work actor in the Big Apple. Okay, so he won't be joining Mensa in the near future, but the story is supposed to a deeply moving love letter to America and the immigrants who come here.
The director, Jim Sheridan, also brought us In the Name of the Father and My Left Foot (both awarded Oscars). This is by far the strongest candidate for my $10.
The Triplets of Belleville
This is a French animated film about a woman who in search of her grandson who was kidnapped by the mafia before finishing the Tour de France. Along the way she is joined by a cabaret sister act.
You'll have to tell me how it was because I'm not going.
My Flesh and Blood
This is a documentary that will make anyone's family seem like the descendents of kings. A woman in Central California is the adopted mother of 11 special needs children. One has no legs, the other is irreparably burned, another has anger issues, a couple are mentally deficient.
If you want to see a movie and go home being grateful for the family you have, then this is the movie for you.
Posted by xx - Ms. Lauren - xx at 9:03 PM | TrackBack
Send them Back
Feeling bad about all the music you've dowloaded without paying for it? 'Fraid you're gonna get caught? Check out SendThemBack.org and absolve yourself now!
Posted by Lucky at 1:30 PM | TrackBack
November 22, 2003
The BBC on the Future of the Music Industry
First article in a series of two on the "Future of the Music Industry" on the BBC website:
Last week, two of the five major record labels, Sony and BMG, announced plans to merge. And it’s likely that EMI and Warner will follow suit, leaving three big majors, each responsible for about 25 per cent of the music we “consume”. The remaining quarter is produced by the independent sector. So how do the people in charge of indie labels see the future of their business, and how will it affect the music we listen to?“I think we’ll mutate into a new type of company - a mixture of artist management, publisher, marketing consultant, agent and promoter,” reckons Steve Beckett of Warp Records. “We’ll be a company representing artists’ ‘careers’, in whatever way they want to be represented.”
Posted by Ms. Jen at 2:45 PM | TrackBack
November 20, 2003
November 21st Film Releases
I took my own advice last week and saw Master and Commander. It was awesome. I love it when I'm right.
Now for this week's picks. This week we have the white man's assisted attempt at a slam-dunk (please see extended version for explanation), Cat in the Hat. Not recommended for anyone older than 5 years or with an IQ above 60. For those of us who are not Neanderthal preschool students, my recommendations are as follows:
1) 21 Grams
2) Barbarian Invasions
3) Shattered Glass (wider release)
Cat in the Hat
A white man's assisted attempt at a slam-dunk is when good old Beaver Cleaver uses a stepladder to reach the net. There's no way he won't make it, but it doesn't make it any less pathetic.
This is the equivalent of making a Dr. Seuss film. You have a ready made, built in audience of kids who first learned to read using "Green Eggs and Ham" and adults who have an incurable case of nostalgia. You don't have to really strain your creative muscles to gross $20 million out of the gate. It’s too easy. Where's the effort?
For those of you who will waste your $10 on this movie instead of waiting for it to come out on cable, I have a warning - The book is ALWAYS better than the movie.
Gothica
This is just another excuse to see Hale Berry naked.
Shattered Glass
Cheaters never prosper, and journalists who make up stories stand in the unemployment line.
I recommended this movie a few weeks ago. It did well enough in its platform release to deserve a wider screening. A good $10 candidate.
21 Grams
This is one of those everyone's-connected-it's-a-small-world stories that brings together a drug addicted single mother (Naomi Watts), a college professor (Sean Penn), and an ex-con (Benicio Del Toro). Now all it needs is the Skipper and the cast for the new Gilligan’s Island will be complete.
A solid cast and a hot young writer/director who is still stretching his legs, this is the strongest candidate for my $10.
Barbarian Invasions
An estranged son comes home to take care of his terminally ill divorced father, and then has the brilliant idea of inviting his father's friends, relatives, and old flames to see him off into the great beyond. Havoc ensues.
This movie has won more festival awards than I care to count. The only drawback, it’s in French. It is not for the illiterate or those with afflicted with ADD, but it is a candidate for my $10.
Blindness
A blind widow's house is broken into by a man who was wrongfully convicted of a crime committed by her late husband.
Your guess is as good as mine.
Blue Gate Crossing
A teenage love triangle set in Taipei, between a boy and two girls.
Hmmm... young Asian lesbians. This has average straight man appeal written all over it.
Posted by xx - Ms. Lauren - xx at 9:15 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack
INVASION: AXF
THIS IS AN INVASION! Well, sort of. This is the APRILFALLING invasion, soon to be a regular around these Barflies parts.. Be on the lookout for images/art/band.photography/collages/etc*infinity - anything and everything visually interesting and appealing..
here's a piece i thought i'd share for starters:
Also, if you have an idea/phrase/song.lyric/expression/image/etc. you want to use to try and influence my post, email me: aprilfalling@kuci.org . Are you up for the challenge?
<3 AXF
p.s. current music: Tears For Fears - "Mad World"
Posted by xx - aprilfalling - xx at 5:09 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack
November 18, 2003
Halloween and Throwrag
The Throwrag & Menace at Halloween show review and photo essay is now up and ready for your viewing eyes and pleasure...
Posted by Ms. Jen at 12:55 AM | TrackBack
November 15, 2003
Nikki Sixx Thighs
Kim Carnes' sung a song entitled, "Bette Davis Eyes." I would like to introduce the rock'n'roll concept of Nikki Sixx Thighs. It came to me during an inspired moment at the Garage in Silverlake on Thursday night, while I was watching The Stitches play the 4th to last live music show ever at the Garage. Starting on Tuesday, the rock dive known as the Garage will be a dance club.
Anyways, back to thighs. Really great rock'n'roll has always been, in a large part, an blatant expression of male sexuality. As a confirmed fan of rock and of men, I particularily love it when tall (at least 6'), built / meaty rock guys (no skinny men need apply) wear tight or tight-ish leather or pleather pants, as their long, but shapely thighs are showcased by their choice of pants. Meow....
Motley Crue's Nikki Sixx pioneered this look in the 1980s, much to my delight at the time and now.
Needless to say, I am not a fan of baggy pants on men. They don't have to wear pants so tight that their personal parts are in threat of strangulation, but men ought to show off their thighs a wee bit more often.
Johnny Witmer, of The Stitches, is tall, meaty in the right places, and was kind enough to wear red pleather pants on Thursday evening. He had a good case of Nikki Sixx Thighs going on.
Only one problem.... About the third song into The Stitches set, I turned to Lulu and asked, "Ummm... is Johnny wearing boxers under his red pleather pants?" Lulu looked closer and nodded.
Just say no to chonie lines when you are wearing rock'n'roll pants, it distracts from the Nikki Sixx Thighs....
Posted by Ms. Jen at 8:48 PM | TrackBack
November 13, 2003
November 14th Film Releases
Someone needs to beat the studio execs into submission until they fully and unquestioningly understand the notion that part of what makes democracy such a riot is freedom of choice. How can we exercise this right without VARIETY? It’s like a MilkyWay without the caramel. All you have is a Three Musketeers, which is a completely different animal.
This week there is only one obvious choice for my $10, and it stars my favorite Spanish slave with an Australian accent. The good lord had a hand in creating him.
1) Master and Commander
2) The Big Empty
3) Tupac: Resurrection
Master and Commander
A hundred men. One boat. Months at sea. Are you sure they're not gay?
Russell Crowe is ready set the hearts of the world a flutter as Lucky Jack, the Captain of an English Navy vessel in 1805. There are storms, fight scenes, and explosions. With those elements and the direction of Oscar winner Peter Weir, we have all the makings of an excellent waste of two hours.
Looney Toons: Back in Action
Who green lighted this? Who in their right mind thought this was a good idea?
Cartoons and washed up actors save the world from an evil corporation. Commie bastards.
Tupac: Resurrection
If you like rap, if you're a Tupac fan, here is the film for you. Apparently it’s filled with original songs, poetry, and interviews.
The Big Empty
Jon Favreau (Swingers, Made) stars as failing actor John Person, sent to the middle of nowhere to deliver a package and make some easy money.
Hmmm. Art imitates life?
Anything But Love
Our leading lady is lounge act at the airport Howard Johnson hotel and has to choose between the stuffy rich lawyer and the scruffy poor piano teacher.
Cheesy and predictable. As natural together as a smoker with a hacking cough.
Posted by xx - Ms. Lauren - xx at 8:22 PM | TrackBack
November 11, 2003
In Loving Memory...
of Miss Norma Jean Avila
This week we lost our friend Norma Jean to a drunk driver. Miss Norma Jean was so full of life, so excited to be alive, that this is a terrible shock. Our condolences to her friends and family and all those that knew her. She will be missed.
A memorial to celebrate her life will be held at the Doll Hut Tuesday, November 11th, at 8:30 p.m. Please join us to remember Norma.
Posted by DJWanda at 10:40 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack
November 8, 2003
Stripper Pooh
Betcha didn't know that Pooh Bear has a side career as a stripper in Long Beach...
Posted by Ms. Jen at 8:31 PM | TrackBack
West Coast Choppers' No Love Party
This afternoon was the West Coast Choppers 'No Love' Party in the LBC. A good 2,000 - 2,500 folks were there at the height of the afternoon, 92% men and less than 8% women, as well as lots of LB Firemen and EMTs, and a LBPD helicopter circling the sky. Bikers galore. The odds were very very very good, but the goods were very very very odd....
Happy Birthday to West Coast Choppers' Jesse James. And to Manic Hispanic for playing a great set of punk rock. And an even bigger thanks to all my friends who let me take their pics and put them up. Louisa, here you are...
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Posted by Ms. Jen at 8:05 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack
November 6, 2003
November 7th Film Releases
Not too many releases this week, and I think we all know why. No one wants to compete with the final installment of the Matrix series. Not even yours truly. I'm not even going to do my usual three recommendations. Why bother? You're just going to go see Revolutions anyway. So go. See it. Experience it. Be let down by it (you know you will, nothing will ever top the first).
But for the sake of tradition, I will keep a stiff upper lip, and state the top three candidates for my $10:
1) Neo
2) Morpheus
3) Agent Smith
But remember, there are other movies out there. They're just not The One.
The Matrix Revolutions
Ted Logan is back for his final round until some director makes the tragic mistake of hiring him for another film. Have you seen this guy act? Its as painful as watching the bingo finals at the Senior Olympics.
Anyways, you can't avoid it and you know you want to see it, so go. Watch Neo attempt to save Zion from the machines and the entire universe from Agent Smith.
There goes my $10. Flushed down the drain of "I couldn't wait for it to come out on video."
Elf
Will Farrell plays Buddy, a human who was raised in the North Pole by Santa's elves and goes to New York to find his parents and teach people the meaning of Christmas.
The holidays must be fast approaching for the studios to throw this one at us. Let me check my calendar.... Wait a minute!!!! It’s not for another TWO MONTHS! Nothing good can come of the commercialization of religious holidays. Next thing you know you'll be hearing Christmas carols while shopping for your Halloween costume. The buck stops here people! No Christmas before Thanksgiving. I can only handle one holiday at a time.
Love Actually
If Neo wasn't making his last ditch effort to save Zion this weekend, this is where my $10 would go.
The people who brought you Three Weddings and a Funeral, Notting Hill, and Bridget Jones Diary present yet another romantic comedy. This movie intertwines 10 love stories into one with the intention of telling us that love is everywhere.
Now I know this may shock you - but I have a soft side. Romantic efforts turn me to mush, unless they're sappy. I can't stand sappy. It lacks intelligence.
I've always enjoyed the director's past efforts and I fully intend to enjoy this one as well. Someday. Probably on video. Alone. By myself.
Billabong Odyssey
(Yawn) Another surfing documentary. Go rent Endless Summer.
Posted by xx - Ms. Lauren - xx at 8:15 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack
November 5, 2003
Wanda Jackson on NPR's Fresh Air
As I was out running errands today, I tuned into the local NPR station and heard Fresh Air's Terry Gross interviewing Wanda Jackson.
She had several hits in the late '50s and early '60s, including "Mean Mean Man," "Let's Have a Party" and "Fujiyama Mama." In the '70s she kept recording music, mostly gospel. She's 65 now and still touring. She's just released her first studio recording in 15 years, Heart Trouble. Guest musicians, including Elvis Costello and The Cramps, join her for several tracks.
I recommend tuning into your NPR station today for Fresh Air or listening to the interview online. Not only is Wanda Jackson one of the most gracious women alive, but she is a pleasure to listen to. Fresh Air plays a few tracks off the new album.
Posted by Ms. Jen at 1:57 PM | TrackBack
November 3, 2003
The Worst Album Covers Ever?
Marc Cendella says that these are the worst album covers ever....
Kevin, can you top these with selections out of your collection???
Posted by Ms. Jen at 10:58 PM | TrackBack
Pimp Cups for the 50 Cent Fan in Your Life
Looking for a Christmas present for the 50 Cent fan in your life?
Pimp Cups may be the answer to all of your holiday gift giving dilemmas.
Thanks Davezilla for the link to this one...
Posted by Ms. Jen at 10:41 PM | Comments (5) | TrackBack
E-mail Me!
From the August edition of Training&Development:
"If you've become averse to picking up the phone, you're not alone. An onnline survey from META Group polled 387 U.S. Organizations to find that 80 percent of businesspeople prefer email for work-related communication. The reasons for preferring emailover the phone include:
response flexibility - 84 percent
easy communication with multiple parties - 83 percent
paper trail - 78 percent
faster communication - 40 percent
more productive - 29 percent
easier global communications - 25 percent
proper context - 24 percent
And what of the humble fax? The META Group study found that the number of faxed pages dropped 50 percent in the past five years."
But what about my favorite reason for work e-mails: I really don't want to deal with you at all and e-mail is the least heinous way to do that - 100 percent!
Posted by DJWanda at 9:12 AM | TrackBack
November 1, 2003
Happy Halloween?
According to MSN, the most common Halloween injuries are:
1. tripping and falling due to unfamiliar shoes or hems on long costumes
2. cutting yourself while carving a pumpkin
3. getting hit by a car while crossing the street to get candy
I thought that first one must be a joke until I saw this girl almost eat pavement last night while traipsing in extremely high heeled boots. Be careful ladies!
In an alternate report, the United States Consumer Products Safety Commission has recorded that the three most common Halloween-related injuries are:
1. Eye abrasions from sharp objects attached to masks or costumes
2. Skin irritations or rashes from decorative face paints or creams
3. Burns from flammable costumes being ignited by open flames (candles)
Whatever you do this weekend, BE CAREFUL!
Happy Halloween!
